It’s still January, which means it’s still New Years resolution time.
The past couple weeks, I’ve realised that, by hurting myself, I’ve been able to get out of helping with, well, everything. Can’t ask me to clean, carry groceries, shovel the driveway. It’s fucking fantastic!
So one of my resolutions is to hurt myself more so I can continue not helping. And what better way than with one of the most impressive and exciting new Denver acts – Mind Incision, accompanied by one of the most impressive lineups: Defected, Thrash Hard City, Carnal Contempt, and Burial Plot?
Metal. Another injury should be easy. The normal thing with metal, and this show was no different, is that the possibility for injury increases with each band. The openers, people are walking in from the cold, don’t know what to expect. Headliners, people are warm and angry. In between, it’s a gradient of temperature and emotion.
Stepping stones – I could pace myself. I could feel out the bands and find the perfect opportunity to achieve my resolution!
Or not, because it only took two bands for me to hurt myself. Two bands in, so Thrash Hard City, and I had succeeded! Except I hurt my already broken arm and pussied out the rest of the show. But it’s metal, so obviously, there were ways I could have further injured myself. Ways like…
Mosh pits. Unfortunately, during this metal staple, this was how I hurt my already hurt arm. Fuck me. And fuck the dude who couldn’t hurt my non injured body parts! I had to sit out about… how many bands played? 5? So I had to sit out the majority of the mosh pits? That sounds about right considering each band had 1-3 during their set.
Stage diving. There was a point where Burial Plot invited people on stage. Which meant drunk people. Stage diving. Into a crowd of people punching the air.
Over and over without a second thought of maybe not jumping into a crowd of aggressive fists. I don’t think the people stage diving wanted to get hurt, but I totally could have if I wasn’t a pussy. Broken neck city, no shoveling for me! Or maybe I could have used my one good arm to catch the divers – no more carrying grocery bags!
But of course… I didn’t. I posted up a safe distance away instead.
Wall of death. In metal, there’s this thing called the wall of death, where people create two walls opposite each other then run into one another as hard as they can. Which Mind Incision made happen inside the Bluebird, a venue known for this type of shit.
Small venue with a bunch angry people running at each other? What a missed opportunity for me. Just look at that photo at the top of this post. Look how dangerous it looked. Dammit!
Beach balls. …’nuff said?
It’d be weird if anyone felt disappointed after that monster night of metal, but if you happened to feel a slight breeze of disappointment tonight, it was me. Not because of where I was – this was one of the most impressive local shows regardless of genre I’ve been to period. So much so, I had to add “impressive” as a tag. If I had way with words, I would probably find a handful more ways to say “impressive”. But I fucking hate dinosaurs and the thesaurus is no exception.
The disappointment was because I left with no new responsibility-preventing injuries despite being provided ample opportunity by our gracious hosts.
New year, same pussy – me.
It’s the beginning of the year and I’m unapologetically broke and once again pitching my wares.
