A while ago, I thought to myself, “what would happen if a snobby asshole went to a metal show?” And this happened. And then I thought to myself, “what would happen if a snobby asshole went to a metal show with foreign bands?” And this happened.
The point being, Smash Into Pieces are a Swedish rock band, I haven’t gotten to do any fun voices in a while, and I want to. So I am. I’m taking the high-ciety prick to the Thousand Frames, Versus Me, Smash Into Pieces show. Why not?
……….
The weather is beautiful now; short sleeves let the late sun grace my arms as I walk into what was touted to me as a Swedish exhibition of music. One would hope this isn’t like last time with the Mongolians, where my experience can be interpreted by my bluntness.
I notice many families await the experience; are these parents good? Bad? My heart tells me they’re quite alright, but my gut tells me the opposite. Which one do I follow? The answer will present itself soon enough.
Three musicians from Colorado trudged onto the stage first. Colorado isn’t Sweden – not a good start if you’re a fan of geography! They titled themselves Thousand Frames and I learned nothing about Swedish culture from them! They reminded me of the first time I was told to go to one of these blasphemous shows. I see myself as fortunate that they relied on atmosphere and showmanship to get their message across as opposed to screaming at me while trying to kick my face. Despite these positives, I am a man of culture and cultured I did not become during this advertisement of domestic offerings as opposed to international.
They preceded a group I assume call themselves Versus Me; again, not from Sweden. Why I was told this would be a Swedish exhibition is beyond my comprehension. They brought back those dreaded memories from the darkest corners of my brain; they were of similar style “musicians” to Asking Mr. Alex I believe their names were? Something along those lines. I refuse to correct myself as they did me no favors to earn it.
But I did not come here to see Asking Mr. Alex lite! I came here to see Swedish music! Good for you young men that these kids can sing back your words to you; I don’t care! I don’t like the growling; this is a known quantity! I’m starting to suspect my gut was right instead of my heart when I first strolled inside of this locale and saw all these parents and their children!
At last, the Swedes of Smash Into Pieces grace the stage! If I had known they were called “Smash Into Pieces” perhaps I would have stayed home, as that is an epitome of what they do. Not to physical things, no, but to my understanding and want of foreign cultures and ideas.
They sing melodically, that I will give them, with seemingly zero effort. But they seize the epileptic with bright and flashy lights. “This is our first headline tour” they say, and I can understand it! Not because of how they present themselves; not because of their influence over the crowd; not because of their knowledge of one another on stage.
Because of their flashing lights which can cause seizures in the disabled. Who am I kidding? After these wretched experiences, I need to thank God Almighty that I don’t suffer from these ailments; musicians don’t care about the epileptic. But I do. And perhaps that’s my calling in life.
Good night to you Swedes! I’ve learned nothing!
……….
I enjoy doing that. A lot. The only downside is having to fill in the gaps from a normal human perspective. Thousand Frames were like a delicious burger that needs more salt – a tight group with a confident showman at the helm, but something was missing. I don’t know what was missing, but if you do, leave a comment. But whatever it was, it was the musical equivalent of a dash of salt.
Versus Me reminded me of every other metalcore band I’ve seen, including Asking Alexandria, or Asking Mr. Alex if you’re a prick. Is that bad? Is it wise to remake the wheel? Should you just put your own branding on it? I would have asked the crowd their opinion but they were singing along. And I would have asked their drummer, but with his cop meme smile, it was obvious what he thought. Maybe there’s a reason metalcore bands stick to the formula of high kicks, high screams, high as balls(?) in Colorado.
Smash Into Pieces were surprising. And by that, I mean I could have sworn they were lip syncing. But Chris Sörbye’s, for lack of knowing how to use the thesaurus, diatribes proved otherwise. They have no bass player, he’s a really focused singer, and once those ideas snapped into place, I think the high-ciety prick makes a good point – this might be their first headline tour, but it doesn’t feel like their first headline tour.
But it’s not because of their light show. It’s because the little details are so well done that I thought the backing track was simply synth at first. Now I’m pretty sure it was synth, bass, vocal effects, maybe light effects, maybe controlled by their drummer, maybe not. The synchronised lights were entertaining and on point, as synchronised lights are.
The details were solid. As was the lady in the audience who brought them wine.
Wanna hear more thoughts from the prick’s mouth? Join the mailing list! It’s free.
